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September 19, 2018 / Heather

Writing with a Bad Wrist

So, I know I’ve mentioned at least a time or two before, probably more times than I realize or can remember, but in any case…

This post is about writing with a wrist that doesn’t always cooperate. It’s going to be a little (a lot?) more serious than I tend to try and be. I usually try to be my goofy weird self, but sometimes I need to be serious.

I’m a writer. And I have tendonitis.

So what IS tendonitis?

The way it was explained to me back when I was “diagnosed”)is that it’s tendons that inflame. The way I tell people is usually “it’s like carpal tunnel, but there’s no surgery” or “it’s an RSI (repetitive stress injury)” or something akin to one of those. Basically when my wrist gets too worked it ends up hurting. A LOT. Most usually to the point where I can’t do anything with my wrist. It’s also one of the reasons I’m anal about ergonomics with keyboards and such being so important.

I used to do a LOT of writing by hand. Honestly, that’s all I did was write by hand unless otherwise required. I ended up doing so much writing (and texting and typing and other such things) that I essentially caused permanent damage to my wrist. I went from being able to write several pages at a time by hand to not being able to make it through writing one page by hand without severe pain.

These days I can write a page or so by hand without much pain, but there’s still pain involved. I have to be careful of what I do and how much I do. It’s a really good lesson in taking care of yourself and I wish I hadn’t had to learn it in the way that I did.

With that said yes, even the way I type sometimes does end up causing me some pain. Usually it’s a mixture of the amount that I’m typing/writing by hand and the weather even. If it’s too hot or too cold there’s a good deal of pain. Usually the hotter it is the more prone to pain I am. It’s part of why I always try to carry Aleve (I get the generic stuff) in my bag.

This is the 7th blog post I’ve drafted tonight. I’m on a roll, what can I say? Am I going to regret all this typing in the morning? Yes. Do I regret this already? I’m getting there. I love the typing and everything and yes, it’s been worth it, but it comes at a cost. This is the last post I’m drafting for the evening and it’s taken me longer to type this post out than it did to write the 6 other posts start to finish. Part of it is the ergonomics issue, but part of it is also the issue of how much I’ve typed so far this evening so quickly (and how much typing I’ve done in the rest of the day as well).

Take care of yourselves guys. Be it your wrists, arms, ankles, eyes, of whatever… Be careful. If I could go back and tell myself what I know now, I’d have done a few things differently (and not just in my dating life, lol).

~Heather/Razor/Shavor

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September 12, 2018 / Heather

Still Alive Over Here!

Hey everyone,

Sorry, sorry, I know I end up saying this quite a bit, but I AM still alive over here in my corner of the world. Even if I feel dead some days, I promise you I am alive. Maybe not always well, but I am alive.

I’m gearing up for NaNoWriMo in November and I’m excited. Even if my annual NaNo panic has started setting in a month early this year (I think that’s partly due to being an ML this year and I’m concerned that my co-ML has never apparently participated in NaNoWriMo and a few other things there). I have a lot of plans and things to get done both NaNo related and a lot of stuff to do that’s not NaNo related.

I’m not sure what’s going to make me crack first though, really. There’s a lot going on and a number of things that are making me question a LOT of things some days. I’m also slightly concerned about myself that I haven’t even STARTED the Laurell K. Hamilton book that came out on August 7th. Y’know, the book I pre-ordered in 3 different formats that I have picked up several times, but have yet to actually open and read despite the fact that the last book she released I ended up going to 3 different stores on the release day for a physical copy to start right away.

I’m only a LITTLE ashamed of myself right now over that. But anyway…

I have no idea where I was going to go with this post. I’ve been more active on Instagram (PoetRazor13) and on the Facebook page for writing (H.R. Shavor, you can find a link on the contact me information page here on the blog).

To all you lovely and patient people, thank you for putting up with my lack of postings. I appreciate it and those of you who want them get hugs. To those who have been silently impatient, I appreciate you too because the silence doesn’t make me really nervous and cause anxiety issues.

This is just a very bare-bones post at the moment. Even if it’s full of me rambling.

I did have an interesting moment at work last week though that I’d like to share with you.

I work a public desk… I was working the desk and someone came in. She asked if I’d written any poetry lately. Guys… GUYS! I spaced out and had a moment of “how do you know I write poetry” and kind of paused there in awkward silence for what felt like a few minutes before I realized SHE PROBABLY READS THE PAPER AND LIKELY REMEMBERED THAT I PLACED 2ND IN THE POETRY CONTEST EARLIER THIS YEAR!!! X_X I was dead. I was so mortified with myself.

And then I felt bad because I haven’t written any actual poetry for some time because life has been in the way of all sorts of things and I just really haven’t bothered sitting down to write any poetry for a long time. What feels like a very long time, actually.

I should remedy this, but I have a novel to plan. I have no idea what my title will be this year. Currently there sits no novel information on my NaNoWriMo account for the year because while I have a good idea that’s partly fleshed out with what I’m to be writing about this November I refuse to put it up on the NaNo site until I have a title for the project. That’s just how I am. I feel like I need at least a working title I’m happy with before I announce a project. Who knows. Maybe one will come to me sometime soon. Maybe while I’m in the shower tonight. *shrugs* Only time will tell. Or maybe I need to take my dog on a walk soon and listen to music while I do. Or meditate on what my title should be.

Needless to say there are several option I have for how to get a title to start floating around my head.

I AM, however, excited because tomorrow marks the first time I’ll be attending a writing group meeting with some friends. We’re starting up the group that used to meet at the library where I used to live and we’re going to start talking about regular meetings and such. I’ve got so many idea options for writing group related things that it’s unreal. It’s seriously unreal at this point. Like… I’m scaring myself with the number of ideas for writing group that pop into my head.

It’s like there are far too many ideas in my head for me to keep contained.

I also have SEVERAL ideas for things related to my blog here and for my Facebook page in regards to some changes or some upcoming things that I’m interested in. While I’m sitting here frantically typing at this computer in front of me I’m reminded of just how quickly I can type some days. It feels all sorts of gloriously wonderful and I deeply love it.

I do believe this is enough rambling for one night. Maybe I’ll finally get around to drafting some upcoming posts for a few things. Ha! Maybe…

Peace everyone.

~Heather/Razor/Shavor

August 8, 2018 / Heather

Feeling… Good?

I’m going to start by stating flat out. I have not been well. Mentally and emotionally. I’ve been a mess. Some days I go on auto-pilot and that’s not like me.

The last week has been especially rough. It’s been silent when I need noise and noisy when I need silence. I’ve had people reaching out to me who aren’t the person or people I want to have reaching out to me.

But today…

Today, I feel good!

Why?

This is part of it. I’ve had sleep and caffeine. But that’s not the best of it.

For the first time in probably near 2 months I worked on Unexpected Moments. I had wanted to get this round of revisions done through July for Camp NaNo and I could not do it. I was not in a mental state where I could work.

My job has had some chaos to it and yes, that added to an already high level of stress, but I was able to manage a lot of it, sometimes not in the best ways. There were a couple of nights this week I cried while lying in bed. Cried because I could not handle the thoughts in my head.

I will not vent those thoughts here, this post is about feeling good.

The way Unexpected Moments is printed for my edits has 2 pages side-by-side on a page. This works incredibly well for this story for me. It totals 135 pages.

I finished what I had wanted to be a month of work in one day.

In what was probably 6 hours or so. I don’t know for sure, I didn’t time it. Kind of wish I had!

There is still one piece that is bothering me, but I can do another round of edits. Maybe.

My goal for today was to get all the revisions typed in so I could focus on planning and plotting for NaNo coming in November. I’m excited for it and I want to plan and plot something new. I have an idea for it and it’s going to take more planning and plotting than things I’ve written in the past.

My point is, you won’t always have good days. Or even weeks. Some days and weeks the story you have will be the last thing on your mind or the thing you want to think about least in the world. Writers joke a LOT about how if our story was alive it would beat us or that the story is begging for our attention. But we don’t always remember to find peace with our story.

Sitting down and listening to music while working on my story? Is the most peace I’ve felt in a long time. And damn do I feel good.

~Heather/Razor/Shavor

July 25, 2018 / Heather

So… Yeah…

This isn’t the place where I will go into details, but I wanted to let you know kind of why I’ve been silent the last couple weeks.

There’s been a major change in my life. That’s all I’m open to sharing about it at the moment. It’s been an emotional ride not just for myself, but for those around me who know what’s happening. If you would like to know details or the specific thing I’m going through there are ways to reach me through the contact me page. I feel like there is still dust settling. It’s been a long journey with a lot involved in it. Thank you all for your patience while I’ve been silent.

Things I’m looking forward to at some point:

  • Meeting up with a close friend
  • The dust settling
  • NaNoWriMo
  • Being an ML for NaNoWriMo
  • Finding out more about myself as I open up and am more honest with myself

I’m not entirely sure what I’m going to be working on this year for NaNoWriMo, but I know I’m excited for it and for the things I’m going to be tackling this year.

Sorry for another short post guys.

~Heather/Razor/Shavor

July 4, 2018 / Heather

Small Post

So not a huge post today. I don’t feel like talking too much. I did want to say I hope everyone is well and to share some great news!

I’m going to be the ML for my local NaNo region this November!

I guess that’s all. If you have questions ask and I’ll answer! To those doing Camp NaNo I wish you luck and I’d love to know how your Camp goes!

~Heather

June 27, 2018 / Heather

Changes, Updates, and Chaos

I’m sorry now for this, but I’m not giving many details about what’s happening though I want to let you all know something.

Last weekend I effectively turned my life upside down and shook it. And let me tell you I shook it hard. In doing this there was a lot of pain caused, but also some realizations. Saturday it felt like things were exploding in my face, but Sunday was better, especially after talking to a good friend of mine and helping her work through something while she helped me work through something.

Change is not always bad. Sometimes it is, but not always. It’s going to be a trying time in my life for a little while, but I’m facing this head-on. Wish me luck.

Updates! I went through last week and updated a lot of things. Like my About Me page, the contact me page, and information on stories I have posted online. It’s not perfect, but it’s better than it was, I think.

As far as chaos goes? That’s tied in with the changes happening so there’s a lot of chaos in effect for me but at the moment, I’m enjoying it. After the primary chaos I’m feeling better now than I did at the very start of the chaos and I’m trying to not let things bleed over. Which isn’t easy.

Unexpected Moments is coming along really well and I’m happy with where it’s at right now. In July I’ll be working more on it and trying some more polish techniques. I’m excited. About the story and about a lot of things..

~Heather/Razor/Shavor

June 20, 2018 / Heather

Fail Whales & Ink Machines

So a few weeks ago while at work we had an interesting conversation. For some time we had all been playing with puppets getting them ready for our world. During one conversation a coworker grabbed a whale puppet and moved it while saying “That deserves a fail whale!” And guys…

I LOST MY MIND LAUGHING!!!

The last time I’d heard of the fail whale reference was when Twitter was so heavily used that it regularly crashed so it’s been over 5 years since I’ve seen it because I use Twitter less and less it seems. I don’t even remember the conversation, I just remember fail whale and laughing my head off.

On the topic of ink machines, there is a game I have been meaning to play but still haven’t yet called Bendy and the Ink Machine. It’s a horror game, but reminds me of classic original Disney with character design and the feel.

You play as a man who left this animation studio 30 years prior and you’re back by invitation to come meet with your former partner. And things get crazy.

That’s all I know because as I said I haven’t played it yet.

I’ll be back to talking about writing next week.

June 12, 2018 / Heather

Back at it

Sorry there was no post last week guys.

I’m back at the story, working on more edits and revisions and trying to not rewrite the entire story while filling plot holes and answering questions.

I was hoping to get some work done last weekend, but I won’t hide it, the weekend was hard. It was the lowest I have felt for a long time. My emotions swing the spectrum and last weekend was proof of it for sure. I’m not sure I can describe just how “off” I was.

In good news I reconnected with a friend so I had a decent support system going in a way. Catfish was putting up with mood swings and my other friend was putting up and reassuring me that I wasn’t being annoying throwing random thoughts at the wall so to speak.

I did have a draft started for last week and it’s something I really want to post at some time and I will. Just have to flesh it out. While I’m sitting here working on edits and thinking I wanted to make a post about being low.

I have no idea how to properly end this post, so I will end it with the following.

If you’re struggling with low moments my heart goes out to you. We all have them, but some have more of them than others and some people don’t have or don’t feel they have a support system. You all get hugs if you want them. We are all struggling with things each day.

Also, enjoy a picture of my dog being the most gooberish thing.

Peace everyone.

~Heather/Razor/Shavor

May 30, 2018 / Heather

Heat

The weather where I’m at is currently far too hot for it’s own good.

Add to it, one of our buildings at work was having cooling problems today. I felt horrible for one of my coworkers because he was in that building.

All I want to do is lie in a pool filled with ice water and read. Or sleep. I could sleep in a pool full of ice water right now…

But alas, I have to wait for weather to cool down.

I have made no progress with the story at this moment in time. No reason why, just haven’t made any progress. Kind of a slump month I guess.

I smile whenever I see any notes relating to the story. Which would be any time I open my planner so almost daily… Yep, I’m a nerd.

I kind of have a plan for what story will be following Unexpected Moments, though. And I’m seriously excited about that one.

For now, I’m going to enjoy where I’m at (story wise, remember I’m apparently living in Hell at the moment). 🌡️☀️🔥 Why is there no melting snowman emoji?

Stay comfortable everyone. Don’t melt. Or freeze for those of you suffering through winter right now.

~Heather/Razor/Shavor

May 24, 2018 / Heather

Snowbound Reception

Hey everyone,

I was lying in bed last night when I realized I never had a post drafted or scheduled so nothing came through yesterday. I’m slipping.

What did I do yesterday? I kind of panicked I guess. Last night was the reception for the Snowbound Writers’ Contest. Last year I got 3rd place, this year I got 2nd. Both times I’ve placed were with pieces about exes of mine. So I guess that would say something about the emotion that is brought on when I think of them. Last year it was about missing an ex who has been a friend. We realize our relationship attempts failed and we still had enough respect for each other that we wanted to stay friends. We had a lot of shared interests and there were things we felt comfortable telling each other and I’d seen him through his dad coming back into the picture and then dying just as they were forming a bond and he helped me reel in my anger when he knew it was getting to the point it was consuming me. He saw me through a lot of darkness.

This year it was a piece about an ex who for all intents and purposes I feel ruined my emotional health. Multiple times he cheated on me, added to anxiety, and for the longest time I associated so much good music with him that I couldn’t listen to anything by those artists for years. I still have to be careful what pieces I listen to, but I’m getting there. The trick is to make new memories to combat and override the bad ones from him.

screenshot_20180518-125331_docs7328329914723034661.jpg

Sorry if the image is king of big, but it’s the best I could do at the moment and I didn’t want to copy/paste the piece. Inspired partly by the song “Breakeven” by The Script. I love that song and even though it’s sad I listen to it and it brings back happy thoughts and just brings me a lot of piece.

If you’re looking for Unexpected Moments updates I don’t have any at the moment. I did some planning on the revision/edit round 2 process, but we’ll see if I stick to that or if something else comes up or happens. I’m playing around with a few other things too. Like formatting (yes, still) and the idea of putting other books out. I think I know what story I want to get out after Unexpected Moments. It’s another one of the stories that I feel a stronger than normal connection to.

If you’re looking for other things of mine to read you’re welcome to browse my DeviantART page as well as my Wattpad account. I hope you all have a peaceful weekend.

~Heather/Razor/Shavor